Another quick update on my post-surgical condition, since it is still affecting my work, which many of you financially support.
Recovery has been slower than I anticipated. I thought by now I'd be back up to speed, or at least 80-90% there. This has not been the case. Although my belly is largely healed, I can't say the same for my lungs, which were already damaged because of many really brilliant years of cigarette smoking. For a week after returning home I fought a nasty cough (likely picked up at the hospital), finally had it checked out, and it was ruled, sure enough, a viral infection. It then went away, but now it's back, worse than before. In the past couple days I have spent more time dry-hacking and convulsing than I've spent saying Hail Marys in penance for the recent sins of the nation -- and I'm not Catholic. (I suppose you could say that mine is sort of a political Pascalian wager: It can't hurt.) At any rate my fear, as anyone's would be, is that I've contracted pneumonia; I just took an online test for it and scored 7 out of 10. (Amusingly, I was exempted from the symptom of "diarrhea," but only because my recent hospitalization was for the purpose of removing my colon -- that's one dandy way to forever avoid the runs -- which, indirectly, has led to respiratory complications.) But so far no high fever, which, if it comes, will send me back to the clinic. Barring that, medical advice is to rest. Lord knows I'm doing plenty of that, since a profound fatigue allows little else. From what I have gathered in my layman's research, if pneumonia I do have, it should, with proper home care, pass within a week. Should I vanish from these here Internets by next Tuesday, you'll know it didn't. OK that was a joke. On the less dark-humored side, I just realized I haven't writhed in another freakishly convulsing episode for a good 15 minutes, so perhaps I'm already on the mend.
My apologies. This "quick update" has grown, perhaps, inexcusably lengthy; on the other hand you, my financial supporters, deserve from me that which we'll never see from -- oh sweet Jesus, this is still so painful to write -- President Trump: transparency.