If you don't read dick Morris' columns in The Hill -- yeah, that Dick Morris -- then you're missing a brand of exotic brilliance that only a reptilian Fox News analyst can provide. The high substantive mysteries of his mind surely border on the ineffable; nevertheless he labors weekly revealing elaborate nothings of any value except that of high entertainment.
His latest? A grand, splendiferous twofer: an observation on the state of President Obama's nefarious "tack to the left," and a prediction -- framed in a stunning tautology that only Mr. Morris could proffer as insight -- that "Obama will lose in 2012 for reasons very different from his victory in 2008." (Go ahead, I dare you, ponder the glittering, blinding imbecility of that line for a while. Warning: You could go mad, mad I tell you.)
Ah, but Dick shall render unto us some proof of his deep, probing, predictive analysis. Ready? Here's the setup:
By the time the next election comes around, voters will see all around them evidence of his weakness and incompetence.
Yes, it's everywhere, this "weakness and incompetence"; it's mounting, it's unmistakable, it's simply impossible to any longer ignore. Prosecutor Morris' Exhibit A -- and I kid you not:
It is now evident in the escape of Taliban prisoners in Afghanistan.
Superfluous italics mine.
But you demand empirical evidence, Mr. Morris hears you cry. Well then good enough. Brace yourself, you reality-deniers:
A president who attacks the rich and seeks to divide the country might be able to rely on the base to keep his approval ratings in the low 40s, but he has no way to get reelected.
You know, like Franklin Roosevelt -- never, after 1936, to be heard from again.
I'm sorry, I can't do it. I just can't do it. I intended to paw Morris' ineffability like a tomcat with a toy, but I see that time is already running short this morning and my patience with this idiot even shorter.
So I'll wrap with this. You may wish to order a signed copy(!) of Dick's latest analytical tome -- Revolt! How To Defeat Obama and Repeal His Socialist Programs -- and you can do so online. I know, because it says that at the end of his columns. But first, you may also wish to ask yourself, Why would Morris need to write, and why would I want to read, a book titled How to Defeat Obama when the sinister target "has no way to get reelected"?