Cathy McMorris Rodgers' transcendental Republican response

I was expecting bad, but not that bad.

I also rarely tweet, but Cathy McMorris Rodgers' really bad Republican response to the SOTU address last night compelled me, in medias res, to shriek in pain: "Rodgers is running a tight race with Rubio and Jindal for most insipid Republican Response ever. This is pathetic."

And you can't argue with that. Aside from Rodgers' peculiar compulsion to relate to 300 million hurting Americans her touching life story, comforted by a nearly $200,000 annual income via taxpayers, plus benies, the congresswoman launched into an even more peculiar string of abject enigmas, such as:

Every day, we’re working to expand our economy, one manufacturing job, nursing degree and small business at a time. We have plans to improve our education and training systems so you have the choice to determine where your kids go to school.

Which means anywhere but a public one, I guess, although Rodgers left that hanging. Other than that, what Republican plans--either exactly or even nebulously--for an expanded economy and more jobs have been proposed by, you know, Republicans? What we have heard is their Hayekian-Paulian solution to economic slumps and unemployment, which is that the magical free market will sort things out. In time. Which, one supposes, is what Rodgers meant by one job "at a time," although a little clarity would have been nice.

Nonetheless, Rodgers was undaunted:

As Republicans, we advance these plans every day because we believe in a government that trusts people and doesn’t limit where you finish because of where you started.

In fact you can be even prouder of where you finish, assuming it ain't the poorhouse, having overcome every dunderheaded obstacle thrown in your way, by Cathy McMorris Rodgers (et al).

Who, naturally, just had to revisit the evils of Obamacare:

No, we shouldn’t go back to the way things were, but this law is not working. Republicans believe health care choices should be yours, not the government’s. And that whether you’re a boy with Down syndrome or a woman with breast cancer … you can find coverage and a doctor who will treat you.

Presto. Just like that. No need for fussing about any legislative guarantees that you'll "find coverage and a doctor who will treat you." You instead may either take Ms. Rodgers' word for it, or you can simply recall those pre-Obamacare days when coverage and care dropped gently on all, like the undiscriminating rain.