I gather The Bulwark's Jonathan Last knows watches. He understands their values, components, production, marketing — just about everything there is to know. And in a crackerjack chucklesome piece he alerts us to the latest grift of Donald Trump: Having peddled items for which there are better alternatives at better prices — "diplomas, vodka, steaks, water, sneakers, coins, and NFTs" (non-fungible tokens) — he's now huckstering watches.
And you're in luck. Donald is offering two models; one, the one below, you can have for tha affordable, fits-every-budget price of only $499. But before rushing to his order page, you might want to give this some thought: Aside from its characteristic gaudiness — the Trump signature of all his fine products — Mr. Last ran the all-inclusive-production numbers and came up with the seller's cost of about $60. (Plus you can buy a better watch for half that.)
Model No. 2 you don't want to know about — its retail price, $100,000 — but if you do want all the specs, they're here.
Before leaving this urgent topic, there's one other item I must share. While pondering the ins and outs of the ex-president's infinitely tacky, unpresidential junk-mongering, this glaring incongruity in his carnival barking occurred to the columnist.
Does this not "prove that Trump’s depiction of the American economy as a hellscape is ridiculous?" asks Last. Only guessing but I'd bet Trump was the first to know how ridiculous it is. He just doesn't care; he disregards truth as a thing of any value. (See: Prof. Harry Frankfurt, On Bullshit.)
He's likely to contravene something he said only five minutes ago; he gives it no thought; he throws contradictions around precisely because he's anything but thoughtful; and again, he simply doesn't care what he said, whether five minutes or 16 days ago. Critically, because all he does care about is himself, Trump is without ideology.
I confess, I posted the upper body of this piece only as a perfect lead-in to another jarring incongruity, one by the once-New Left ideologue turned far-right ideologue David Horowitz. He's a true master of the despicably deliberate inconsistency. He's capable of knowing truth, which means he cares about it — especially when twisting it. What was true for Horowitz on Monday might be heresy on Wednesday, yet by Friday he's back to orthodox Monday.
My memory of this particular incongruity is 20 years old, the oddity itself spanning two or three years. and to me it remains the granddaddy of all incongruities, because a) former academic Horowitz knew the truth, so b) his initial incongruity with the truth was done knowingly, then c) he contradicted his first incongruity with a second incongruity with the truth, which means, I suppose, d) by twice leaping for untruthful, extreme incongruities, Horowitz actually strikes an equilibrium, wounding up at a point of truth.
In simpler terms ...
I saw him once in an interview in which he was whipping one of his very favorite boys: college professors. They're sloths who pull in outrageously high salaries merely for giving two, maybe three lectures a week — and with that they're done, said David. Three or four hours of work each week for an annual $100k or more. Professors, he argued, are lazy good-for-nothings who deserve neither their titles, their salaries, nor the community's respect.
Perhaps a couple years later I saw David again, and this time the subject was the scarcity of women professors in science disciplines. The debate: What might be the cause of this academic deficiency? David had the answer, the answer, and he asserted it with great confidence. College professors, he explained, are burdened by long hours of research, writing, lecturing, faculty meetings and conferences. In a typical week they'll exhaust perhaps 80 hours as well as themselves, said David — and women, he continued, either don't want or can't handle such a brutal and taxing job.
I can still marvel at his sophistry. And I'm convinced that in the running competition for greatest all-time incongruities, it's David Horowitz and Donald Trump neck-and-neck, but the former might even have a slight lead. In the category of grift, however, it will take a genuine Olympic champion to overcome Trump, what with his watches, diplomas, vodka, steaks, water, sneakers, coins and NFTs.
Actually Trump’s comments make perfect sense: people can’t buy cereal or bacon or eggs because they’re spending all their money on his awesome watches! When Trump is president you’ll get both! Meaning, as it turns out, crappy overpriced watches and even more expensive groceries (thanks, tariffs!)but hey, magas don't bother with details, y’know.
As for the $100k versions, those are to provide an easy vehicle for people to bribe him. Prince Bonesaw wants to tip him (thanks, Supreme Court!) for, oh, I dunno, bombing Tehran next year? He just buys a hundred of ‘em. Make great Ramadan gifts!
Posted by: ssdd | September 30, 2024 at 10:27 AM